Monday
16Jun2008
Clothing makes the man––insane
Monday, June 16, 2008 
Legend has it that Ernest Hemingway killed himself with a shotgun purchased at Abercrombie & Fitch. Yes, that Abercrombie & Fitch. You see, way back before they became the defacto uniform of drunken frat boys, they were a sporting goods store, outfitting the likes of Amelia Earhart and Teddy Roosevelt. How very sad.And now A&F has infected my home, becoming the store of choice for my teenage daughter. (Hold on, let me take some Excedrin. Okay, I’m back). Here’s how the parent/teenager arguments have been going:
Me: “How can you wear Abercrombie & Fitch? I mean, they charge $70 for a shirt made in a Saipan sweatshop?”
Her: “So?”
Me: “So...they make their clothes in Asia, but then come out with a line of t-shirts with Asian slurs. Doesn't that seem somewhat disingenuous?”
Her: “So?”
Me: “Then they had to pay $45 million to settle a lawsuit for not hiring minorities—and when they did, they made them work in the storeroom, while they put the “pretty white people” up front.
Her: “So?”
Me: “You’re part Asian.”
Her: “Oh, yeah,” She says, while texting her friends. “So, can you take me to Abercrombie?”
No, I never win these battles. The social inertia is just too great. It doesn’t matter if I mention that the soft-core A&F Quarterly was sold to minors or that A&F was slapped for marketing a line of thong underwear with slogans like “Eye Candy” to grade school girls. The Abercrombie zombies are winning.
I wish they still sold shotguns.
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Reader Comments (11)
They didn't like my Payless shoes, but they didn't regret hiring me--I could dress mannequins and fold jeans to a level of perfection never before achieved in their store. (They key is to plump the jeans from the side and round off the front after they're folded.)
(The airline was Delta. I've had such strange experiences with them lately. I think the whole thing might have been averted by checking in from home, though.)
Of course, by the time this had the effect of convincing her that A&F is lame, you'd be out of pocket about $10 K...
**Logging onto Abercrombie online**
Jamie, I have a lime green AF hat that I bought at a garage sale that you can have, just to get the ball rolling, per David's suggestion. Did I mention it's lime green?
I've recently realized my relationship with her (she's 2) is much like a BoSox fan's relationship with Manny Ramirez; love and a resigned "Gracie being Gracie" attitude.
Last night while I was in the other room I hear a THWAP sound and my 4.5yo son saying "OWW!! Gracie NO! Dad you will NOT believe what she just did to me"... so I asked her and she very honestly said "I hit him on da head wif mine Dora backpack!"... which prompted 45 minutes of her being in timeout until she apologized (and I think her brother gave her a free pass by motivating her with a TV show being on as just doing the right thing wasn't on her agenda otherwise).