If there ever was a television show shallower than Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous it would have to be MTV’s Cribs––a show so vapid that it was bound to be a hit. Yes, it’s one of those guilty pleasures that everyone says they never watch, but we all know the truth, don’t we?

And of course, I’ve never seen it. Not even once. Ummm, okay, except for that one time when I lost my remote and the channel button was stuck on my TV and I was in a full-body cast and my eyelids were propped open with toothpicks like Alex in A Clockwork Orange. But that was it––just that one episode with Moby, where I’m convinced he said the only enlightening and culturally relevant thing ever spoken in eight seasons.

It was this: “Where are all the books?”

Leave it to a bald, nerdy guy with spectacles and a bus pass to point out ala the Emperor’s New Clothes that none of the homes ever shown on Cribs had even the slightest whiff of a bookshelf. Or as he put it, “Musicians...the proud, the few, the functionally illiterate...”

Mmmm…kinda gets you right there, dunnit?

Well, since I abhor that show and instead now spend all my free time watching My Super Sweet 16, I thought I’d point out that despite the intellectually anemic music channel (that doesn’t really even have music anymore) there are celebs that read.

In fact, they’re so passionate about certain books that they buy the film options themselves instead of leaving them to be gobbled up by the big studios.

A few notable book/celebrity marriages are:

Tom Cruise––Carter Beats the Devil, Glen David Gold
Gillian Anderson––The Speed of Light, Elizabeth Rosner
Kanye West––Child of God, Lolita Files
Tobey Maguire––Money for Nothing, Edward, Ugel
Tom Hanks–– They Marched Into Sunlight, David Maraniss
Rosie O’Donnell––Riding The Bus With My Sister, Rachel Simon
Kevin Spacey––Memoir from Antproof Case, Mark Helprin
Sarah Michelle Gellar––Lottery, Patricia Wood
Joe Mantegna––Memories Are Made of This, Deana Martin
Owen Wilson––Hello to All That, John Falk
Johnny Depp––Happy Days, Laurent Graff
Bruce Willis––Tenkiller, Elmore Leonard
Madonna––Star Craving Mad, Elise Abrams Miller

And lastly, Daily Variety has reported that Paris Hilton just bought the rights to War & Peace, which she lovingly reads to her bichon frise, Leo, every night.